Underneath The Paper Moon
by AmberAutopsy
Summary: How it should have ended. Jesse and Walter say their goodbyes.


Jesse watched Walter stumble slowly out of the room out of the corner of his eye, the harsh winds that blew outside gusted into the room as he pulled the door open, blowing his jacket back around him.

'Mr. White...' Jesse almost heard himself say as his eye`s dropped, landing on the dark stain that was slowly spreading across one of the lightly colored shirts he always seemed to wear. Instead he turned his head to stare down at Todds body that laid in a heap on the now blood soaked floor under his feet.

"Jesse..."

He turned towards Walter voice, watching as he bent down and slide the gun in his hand across the floor, the heavy metal coming to a abrupt stop as it hit his shoe.

"What is this for."

His voice was quiet when it reached his ears.

Defeated.

Dejected.

"You know you want to..." Walter returned, gesturing a hand towards the gun at Jesse`s feet. His movements slow and forced.

Jesse felt himself scowl as he looked over at the man who now looked ten years older then the last he had saw him, his eyes worn and sunken in, his face pale.

"UGH!" Jesse`s vision suddenly darkened as he slammed his eyes shut, his fists coming down hard on his head. "Say it!"

"Say what..."

"Say YOU want this!" he shot down and took up the gun, closing his hand tight around the cold metal as he held it out at Walter, the nosel aimed at his chest.

"Jesse-"

"NO!" Jesse yelled, trying to block out the thoughts that ran wild in his mind, the memories that played across his closed lids. "NOTHING is going to happen until you say that this is what YOU WANT!"

There was a pause as Walter took in a long, deep breath, closing his eyes momentarily before opening them back up, Jesse`s gaze held firmly in his.

"I...want this."

With a loud gush the air that had been caught thickly in Jesse`s lungs emptied, his eyes burning with the tears he refused to release.  
"You...you-" Jesse`s eyes sliding down to the blood stain on Walter`s shirt before they were slammed shut again, his head shaking violently from side to side, "You bastard." he let the gun fall from his grasp, hearing it clatter loudly to the ground. "Do it yourself."  
Walter nodded slowly, his shoulder`s slumping slightly as he turned his back, making his way out the open door, leaving Jesse to stand there at watch his close with a soft click.

His breath started coming fast, his fist flexing at his side as hot tears started to haltingly slide down his wintry cheeks, suddenly bending over and picking up a nearby chair with numb hands, tossing it into the wall before him.

"SON OF A BITCH!" he yelled, watching the chilled wood shatter against the thin drywall. Spinning on a heel he flung the door open and exited out into the still air outside, his eyes scanning the landscape that stretched out before him until they came to the lab, his gaze catching a shadow just as it disappeared inside.

He entered the lab in a fury, his eyes flashing as they landed on Walter`s back.

"HEY!" Jesse yelled, slamming his hand against the boiler beside him, trying to get Walter to turn around.

But he didn`t.

He just continued to stroll mindlessly down the labs narrow walkway.

"This is bullshit!" he shouted at Walter`s retreating form. "Hey! Listen to me!"

His glare bore into Walter`s back.

"THIS ISN`T HOW IT WAS SUPPOSED TO END!"

"Then," he heard Walter`s faint voice say. "how was it supposed to end."

Jesse`s hands fell limply to his sides, his bloodshot eyes lifting up towards the ceiling. A strangled sob tore it`s way from his throat.

"NOT.." his voice softened as he dropped his head. "Not like this..."

Slowly, Jesse sank down to his knees, his back striking the boiler as he spread out his legs. He felt Walter walk over, not even bothering to open his eye`s as he heard his sit down beside him with a soft groan followed by a short sigh.

For a long time there was silence as they sat there.

Just sat there, eyes closed.

"Mr. White..." Jesse`s whispered words penetrating the thick stillness that had settled around them.

"What, Jesse."

"I...I wish..." here he sighed, opening his eyes and leaning his head back against the metal with a hollow thump. "...I really wish you hadn`t failed me."

Walter let out a short laugh before erupting into a hacking cough.

Jesse sighed and reached up a shaking hand shaking, pushing the pack of cigarettes that Todd had let down onto his lap. Banging it a couple time against his palm he opened it and pulled one out, sticking it into his mouth before turning and looking over at the man beside him.

Hesitating a moment before holding the open pack out towards Walter, who just stared at it for a time.

"Oh fuck it." he said as he reached out to pull out a cigarette of his own.

Dumping the shit colored the pack Jesse lit his before proceeding to light Walter`s.

Once again it was silent for a long moment, both the man lost in their own thoughts.

"You know, Jesse, you can leave...if you want to."

Slowly, Jesse nodded, bringing the almost burnt out cigarette to his lips and taking a long slow drag, watching the red and blue lights flash across the wall opposite them, the crunch of tires pulling up outside.

"Yeah..." he said, blowing the smoke out, watching it float away and dissipate . "I know."

Out of the corner of his eye, he could have sworn, he saw a small smile tug at the corners of Walter`s mouth.

xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx


End file.
